Speedy Eggbert is a strange little man who looks disturbingly like an egg. He is strangely yellow and was featured in a
terrible fantastic videogame with the same title as his name. He enjoys goo. He doesn't enjoy poop, however. He is not the only person who looks like this, as there are others of his kind, but in different colors. He claims to have little or no affiliation to Schmuzzies, at least on Wednesday.